Letting in the Wind

“Our feelings are our most genuine paths to knowledge.” —Audre Lorde.

Change can be difficult. And, possible. Emotions are clues, perseverance necessary. Like so many, I struggle with inherited behaviors. In the middle of the night, after hours of hot air currents gusting through the cabin, I closed the hatches. The sound of whistling wind immediately abated, and stopped grating my nerves. I then wrapped a wet sheet around me to bring down my temperature. Simple things; long time coming. Tolerating discomfort serves nobody, least of all The Bod. Question everything and everyone and everyplace. Good for me? right now? What is my actual truth? regardless of so-called “expert” opinions?

High winds scare me, moaning and rattling the rigging of all nearby. But the sails are sweetly flaked and furled, so Habibi is only rocking from short-fetch waves coming across the harbor. And when I turn the corner to the beach this morning and catch sight of the roughed-up Sea, all Anxiety falls away. Bodysurfing waves!

…and here comes one, unbroken, chest high. I throw myself into the green, kick hard, and laugh all the way to shore.

For my own protection, I can face and ride emotion. There is always a solution. Every feeling is a friend.